Every time we went, it would end in a breakdown of some sort when the family who brought all of the buckets, shovels and pick up trucks had to leave for the day. Worse yet, when the owner of these toys wanted one that Lilli was using at the time. At first, it was hard to explain sharing to her without using the word "sharing." Since the words she understood didn't really help in explaining the concept, I found myself saying over and over "Lilli, share the toys!" I would ask other parents how they taught their child to share. They almost always had the same answer "pre-school/day care." Well, that's not really an option for us right now. So I did the next best thing for a work-at-home mom, I read articles and practiced with her when the opportunity presented itself.
We read a lot of stories about sharing, which seemed to at least initiate the idea into her mind. We would practice at the park, which always resulted in a breakdown, followed by removing her from the area, when a kid left with their bucket and shovels. I felt terrible taking her away from her favorite part of the playground to avoid a scene. Distraction. Distraction. Distraction. While distraction almost always works, it didn't really teach her what we needed her to understand.
In the end the most productive form of teaching her to share was sharing. Go figure. It seemed to click so naturally when we would practice. We would ask her if she'd like to share something we were playing with or eating at home. It seemed to be best understood when it involved some sort of treat she loved. We would ask if we could share something she was using, like her toys. We asked her to share with Taz and Linus. We started having tea parties (holy moly, so cute). It seemed to put an act with a word. A word that was repeated over and over without explanation. Finally, it was starting to come together for her. Sharing is still a work in progress, sometimes we forget and have to start back at the beginning, but we're moving forward most of the time and that's what is important. For the future I need to remember, acting is a far better teaching tool than talking in some cases. I can't just shout words at her and hope that someday she puts two and two together. I need to show her how to be a better person, not just tell her. Lessons learned.
"Song of the Entry"
When I'm Small by Phantogram
